Everything was found on the network, I inserted everything here so that it was at hand. Not a fancy note at all!
Favorite anecdotes on the topic
The woman runs to the store for bread, it’s about five to eight, and will now close. She ran to the porch, looked - a drunk man was lying, looked closer - a normal man, put her hand in his pants, felt - a funky man. She looks at her watch: now the store will close, but it's a pity to leave the man. Well, she thinks: now I will quickly, quickly drop into the store, buy bread, pick up the man and take him home. Flies into the store, takes bread, jumps out of the store - and the man is no longer near the porch. The woman looks in bewilderment at the bread in her hand and says: - What a fool … My God, one might think, two years no bread!
………….
“A terrible flood began in one city. All people began to leave their homes and flee from disaster. One man sat down on the porch of the house and did not move from his place. The water has already begun to rise to the porch, people run past and say to him:
- Run with us, otherwise you will drown.
“No, I’ll stay here, all my life I prayed to God and asked him for help, he will not leave me, he will save me,” the man replies.
Time passes, water flooded the 1st floor. A boat is sailing by.
- Swam with us, otherwise you will drown, - people say to the peasant.
“No, I’ll stay here, all my life I prayed to God and asked him for help, he will not leave me, he will save me,” the man replies.
The water rose to the roof. A raft floats by.
- Swam with us, otherwise you will drown, - people say to the peasant.
“No, I’ll stay here, all my life I prayed to God and asked him for help, he will not leave me, he will save me,” the man replies.
The water rose to the pipe. A log floats by. “I will wait for help from God, I prayed to him all my life, he will save me,” the man thinks.
Finally the whole city was flooded and the man drowned. He appeared in heaven before God and made claims to him:
- Why, God, did not save me, I prayed for you all my life ?!
- Man, do you think who sent people to you? Who sent the boat and raft to you? Who sent the log to you at the last moment? I! If you had figured out in time where the help was coming from, tore your heel off from the familiar place and at least stretched out your hand to the log, you would have stayed alive!"
Also one of my favorites … for those who are looking for a "match")
Once upon a time there were three sisters. One was lazy, lovable. The second is evil, pretentious. And the third one is clever, and beautiful, and a needlewoman, it is a pleasure to watch.
One morning the cart stopped at their gate. The sisters went out to see who had arrived. An unfamiliar elderly woman was sitting on the cart.
- Who are you? they asked.
- I am Destiny. It's time to marry you.
Fate put them on a cart and was lucky to give them in marriage.
They drove into the first village. They see a guy plowing in the field and in his hands any business is going well. If you need to fix or build something, everyone runs to him.
- This one is yours, - says the Fate of the first of the sisters.
They dropped my sister and drove on.
We stopped at the next village. There, a guy lives such that he will not refuse to help anyone. Kind to everyone. The people cannot rejoice at him, such a fellow.
- This one is yours, - says the Fate of the second of the sisters.
They dropped my sister and drove on.
We stopped at the third village. At the last house, in the mud, near the oldest wreck, lies a drunken man. Fate stopped the cart and said:
- This one is yours.
- Why would he be to me ?! the third sister pleaded. - I’m kind, and good, and a needlewoman. And you give me such a groom! What sisters I found - what, there is no other for me?
“There are others,” Fate answered and, sighing, added: “But this one will be lost without you!
…….
One friend is showing off to another.
- You have no idea, you found yourself such a cool guy. He is so rich, he gives me gifts, he gives me money, he drives a car. But, unfortunately, he is not very handsome, I do not like such a pimply. But rich!
- Friend, you didn't find a boyfriend for yourself, but a job …
About love
Anyone can be loved - this is an axiom. There are about five billion of us on Earth, and the ratio of men and women is, in general, the same. Arguing mathematically, we can safely say - there is enough love for everything. Yes, mathematically everything seems to be so, but then why are so many people looking for, looking for, looking for the very one (or the same one) and don't find most of their lives? They do not find it, and at some point they resign themselves to the loss. Why with a loss? And because not finding what you are looking for is the same as losing what you are looking for. People sincerely believe that they will wait for the moment when that one, the only one, will love them and then everyone will be happy. And since happiness is what everyone ultimately needs, then, chasing love, we are looking for happiness.
And love, and happiness, and all other good experiences, these are all just our sensations, experiencing which we feel some kind of euphoria, it is pleasant for us, it throws us up, we are crushed and sausage.
Happiness! Love! A life! Wow!
By the way, an interesting point, people who do not believe in love, explain it like this: “This is all nonsense. There is no love. Fairy tales are everything for girls. Here I am, I know life. And there is no love in my life. Therefore, it does not exist at all. " And you know, I believe them. There is no love in their life, and most likely there will not be. Do you know why? Because they don't believe there is love.
If you don't believe in love, it doesn't exist for you.
It can be assumed that your disbelief arose because you were either hit painfully when you loved, or you were brought up in such a way that your soul is callous and does not feel subtle feelings. Just as vodka lovers do not understand the shades of taste of good cognac, so you do not feel all the richness of the emotions of love. A person who refuses to love is like a gray, dusty and disgusting beech who sits in a room with drawn curtains and does not believe that the sun can be outside the window. And he drives all romantics running in from the street with a hefty broom - "so that the garbage is not brought in."
Buka chases romantics, and romantics run out and after five minutes forget about the beech, because …
Love! Spring! A life!
Romantics are inspired by their experiences so that sometimes it is not easy to stand next to them - "they are so in love, and you …". And where do they find someone to fall in love with? Are the same freaks all around? But, looking at this romantic after a while, when he burns about his love, when he walks and cherishes his pain, at this moment one might think that really - “why is she needed, this love !? Come on, her, with these mental anguish and throwing! Better quiet, but calm."
Do you have such thoughts? It happens, everyone has …
Love has its pros and cons. I have no doubt that offhand you will sketch me a sheet of different thoughts about what good and bad love can bring into your life. Love is both the fear of loss and the delight of meeting, it is the pain of misunderstanding and the enjoyment of each other, it is the rage of jealousy and the frenzy of tenderness.
Love is always a holiday, but often with unexpected and not always pleasant surprises.
The advantages of love are that you seem to come to life. Life begins to play in you.
Love is not hiding from you somewhere far away. Love doesn't mind coming to you at any moment. Love is just waiting for you to invite her and allow her to enter.
found on flirtisforum.ru
About those men
“They are not the same people who walk and wander in the dark,” - something like that was said by one of the classics. And he was right. Especially often women face the problem of “those” - “not those”. Or maybe it seems to me so because I am a woman myself …
So, all the men with whom life confronts us can really be conditionally divided into THOSE and NOT THOSE. TEs are males that we really like, with whom we want to have sex, from which, in the future, we would not even refuse to have children. We have exactly the opposite feelings for the wrong men: we don't want to see them, and we don't want to let them go to our bed for a cannon shot. But NOT THESE men are usually very popular with our mothers, and when they mention THOSE, they, on the contrary, change their faces and ask why we like such gouges all the time, and not positive guys. So what is the difference between these two "biological species" of men?
Those men on the very first evening of acquaintance try to drag us into bed, and we are thrilled with such pressure. NOT THESE men, too, can try to drag us into bed all the same first evening, but we are enraged by their such persistence and unfounded confidence in their own irresistibility.
Those men take our telephone number and promise to call tomorrow. Without waiting for a call within a week, we shove our female pride away, and start calling ourselves to remind THESE men of our existence. NOT THESE men are also begging us for the coveted number and also promise to call back. And they call back … And when we say that we are busy and we cannot meet with them in any way for the next five months, they scrupulously count down five months on the calendar and call back again. This misunderstanding of our veiled "sending" to a known address can continue for as long as you like. All this time, NOT THESE men will tediously and meticulously contact us.
We always expect a call from THOSE men. It is for them that we do not turn off our mobile phones at night. If THAT man calls us at two o'clock in the morning and says that he has just returned from a distant business trip, and is terribly bored, we will be happy. NOT THAT man can call us during the most working hours, we, having seen his number on the phone screen, can still “not hear” the call, and then “forget” to call back.
We justify those men all the time. The fact that they periodically forget about our existence, we explain by their busyness. Their lack of intelligence (if any) is compensated by their boundless personal charm, etc. To the wrong men, we are not ready to forgive not only weaknesses, but also dignity. Conflict-free means a rag, reliable means boring and predictable … Perhaps this is unfair, but it is so.
With THEM men, we feel good in bed. We are ready to meet any (well, almost any) of their fantasies. We can make love to them in their boss's waiting room, where someone might come in, we can afford to be handcuffed or even spanked. It is with THEM men that women are more likely to agree to anal sex or sex without a condom. And we do this not only in order to please those men, but also because we ourselves want it. We are excited only by the anticipation of what, and, most importantly, with whom, we are going to do now, and therefore we ourselves are provided with incomparable pleasure.
NOT THESE men, as mentioned above, generally have little chance of being in our bed. Sometimes, from depression caused by another manifestation of inattention on the part of THAT man, some women still agree to have sex with the wrong men. But in vain. They themselves with a person who does not excite them will not be able to get pleasure. But the WRONG man, too, does not shine anything except "a werewolf girl who turns into a log at night."
Unfortunately, TE men do not always value relationships with us. An affair with them is just a series of non-binding meetings. Probably, we ourselves pampered them with our patience and forgiveness. For this we suffer, because those men usually leave our lives abruptly, beautifully and forever. For example, they leave for another city or even a country, leaving us a few photos, memories (good, damn it, despite the fact that our relationship was far from a romantic ideal) and a pleasant languor in the chest and lower abdomen when we think about them. But not those men, as luck would have it, stick to our life like a bath leaf, you know what.
They watch us under the house and under work, call and fill up with electronic greetings on every conceivable holiday, while showing an amazing ability to cause irritation. When we wait for a call from THAT man, our anticipation will inevitably interrupt the call from the WRONG. When we suffer due to the fact that an affair with another THAT man is forever in the past, the wrong man will certainly come running to us, awkwardly spreading his arms. He will try to console, but his presence will only make it worse. However, NOT THOSE men with their readiness to be more present in our lives can also be adapted to something: fix a computer, move furniture, or, in extreme cases, keep us company in order to go to the movies, because THAT man again forgot to call back …
In a word, TE men are usually crazy actions, sex on the first evening of acquaintance and, alas, usually a short and unpromising relationship. But the WRONG men get all our stock of female pride, saved on THOSE men, which our mothers value so much. Even if NOT THESE men are ready to offer us a serious relationship (maybe even a stamp in the passport), we are still unlikely to agree. Well, perhaps, then, when we finally lose hope of waiting for the SAME prince on a white horse.
found on flirtisforum.ru
A short contemporary play (it's a masterpiece !!!)
A short modern play (1 act, and that one is oral), everything takes place in the city of Vladivostok.
Characters:
- LM (Affectionate Mirzavets) - man cf. years, cf. physique, padonak.
- DB (Devachko-Blondinko) - 23 years old, a good figure and appearance, from a decent family, who happened in the life of a man - completely "daddies", carrying her in their arms and blowing dust from her feet; for a change I got acquainted with LM.
From the author: writing a modern play is quite simple, in fact, you only need to record conversations on your mobile: The main thing is to choose with whom and when.
17.30 (Center).
- LM: "Hello, hello, what are your plans for the evening?"
- DB: "None yet, but what?"
- LM: "They invite you to a barbecue, not far from here, will you go?"
- DB "Super! I'll go, but what time?"
- LM "21.00 must be in place"
- DB "OK, after eight I will be on the embankment,we'll call you"
20.25 (Center)
- LM: "Are you on the embankment?"
- DB: "Yes! A little busy!"
- LM: "What do you mean ?!"
- DB: "I met a friend, went to a cafe to chat, call back in ten minutes!"
20.41 (Center)
- LM: "Hello, so what?"
- DB: "That's it, we're going now, Vika and I are drinking coffee here, come pick us up!"
- LM: "In the sense of" follow us "?"
- DB: "Well, we'll give her a lift home, otherwise she lives on Churkino: Oh, we also ordered dessert here: You'd better drive up in fifteen minutes, OK ?!"
- LM: "OK" (going home)
20.52 (The first river, LM puts the car in the parking lot, changes into a friend's car, goes out of town)
- DB: "Hello, are you waiting for us?"
- LM: "Of course"
- DB:"We'll sit a little longer, ordered the liquor: Vika and I haven't seen each other for a week!"
- LM: "Yes, no problem"
21.55 (Sedanka, LM has drunk a lot, is going to make a barbecue)
- DB: "Hello! It's cool here! We also ordered a liqueur: hic: Only he is dear here:"
- LM: "Don't worry, I’ll pay for you, don’t hesitate"
- DB:" Well, then we will also repeat the dessert?"
- LM: "Well, of course, I'll wait in the car for now:"
22.35 (Sedanka, LM eats barbecue and flirts with girls)
- DB: "Hello! We met Natasha here, she and her boyfriend, will we take them to Neibut?"
-LM: "Of course we will take you: Treat them, by the way, also with liquor:" (laughing stifled)
23.25 (Sedanka, everything is already in the know, the LM phone is turned on "loud")
- DB: "Well, we are already ready to go: We are waiting for you"
- LM:"Yes, I'll drive up now: How much is there?"
- DB: "Five eight hundred"
-LM: "No problem, wait" (Lights out, as people laugh side by side)
23.50 (Sedanka, people drink and dance)
- DB: "Hello! Well, where are you ?!"
- LM: "Yes, I met a friend here, I need to talk.. Call back in ten minutes" (Calms the hysterical company).
00.01 (Sedanka, everyone is looking closely at LM's phone)
- DB: "Well, where are you, all the waiters have already gathered here!"
- LM: "Oh, I'm sorry, I'm not coming today, my friend and I urgently need to walk his dog: And she's already on Quiet: Bye! Good night, smack!" (The phone goes off, LM tries in vain to catch friends falling under the table laughing).
And here …
Try … "- Dream whispered.
"What? Again? ? ? ? ! "- Experience was indignant.
"Heh … again because of me))) "- Reason smiled.
"No! Because of me! ! ! ! "- argued Pride.
"Maybe … not necessary? "- babbled Caution.
"Caution, go to the train station. … poo! "- barked Courage.
"I'm closed for adventures! "- J. pa.
"And here I am! "- Declared Determination.
"Maybe tomorrow is better? "- Doubt asked.
"Today or never! "- Stubbornness snapped.
"The main thing is just not like yesterday! "- the Ordinary warned.
"Yesterday will not happen again! "- Stupidity reassured.
"Everything will be different! "- Premonition lied.
"It looks like something …" - thought Memory.